@anildash my general advice is to think about it in material terms -- if you join a server, talk to the admins ahead of time and come to an agreement like "Hey, me being here is going to result in you having a lot more traffic. You currently make $X/mo in donations from your users. I will chip in an addition $Y/mo so you can afford the next tier of VPS upgrade you'll need to host me" (or whatever)